Thursday, April 25, 2002

Missing 4U Found In Bermuda Triangle!

- From the SOFL "Tabloid" Edition -
Former Port Authority bus line the 4U was loved and well known for its promptness and convenience when it traveled from Highland Park to Oakland.

Current University of Pittsburgh student Tim McGuigan noted, “I adore the 4U, it took me from Oakland to my Highland Park house in fifteen minutes flat! I took that route every day for three months. And I loved it! Then one day, poof, it just vanished. I’m half-convinced it never existed at all. I called the PAT service line and they told me, ‘what 4U?’ I don’t know what to think.”

McGuigan and thousands of 4U riders were left stranded ten months ago when the bus line “disappeared.” Port Authority Transit CEO Paul P. Skoutelas issued a statement denying any knowledge or information concerning the bus line's current whereabouts. “We have had no contact with the 4U since last April.”

Recently, however, there has been hope for 4U enthusiasts. A group of Carnegie Mellon University (CMU) students on Spring Break in Bermuda spotted the elusive bus in the vacation paradise.

“I thought I was seeing things, or perhaps I had just smoked too much pot,” said CMU junior Devin Devran. “But anyway, I got out my digital camera and took some snapshots just in case. When I emailed them to my buddy in Wean Hall, he verified my suspicions. It was the 4U after all!”

Devran and his group of sun seekers then were on a mission to find the bus for the rest of their trip. Unfortunately, they had no other 4U sightings. Requests for any information from the Bermuda Transportation authority were declined.

Port Authority Transit investigators are looking into Devran's claims. They are enthusiastic about this new lead although they still remain realistic about chances of the bus line being put back into service.

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