Friday, February 13, 2004

Point / Weaker Point: Pinkertons

Pinkerton Security Guards Blow My Left Nut!
By Ryan Thompson, 503 Tower B (2004)

I’m tired of those fucking Pinkertons always getting on my case. Those sons of bitches have nothing better to do than bust our shit up. I swear to God, I’m gonna go off one of these days and punch one of those fucking guards in the face.

Why? You ask. Well, take last Friday for example. Bill, Dan, and Scott down the hall were supposed to have a party in room 507, Tower B. We were gonna have some girls over who we met at the tuck-in last Tuesday night. These girls were fine too. All we needed was a bottle of vodka, and we would have been golden. Since I know a lot of over 21 guys, I got my friend Jim to get us a bottle. I went over to his house to pick it up and when I came back the Pinkerton security guard was all up in my shit like, “what's in the bag?” I told him some old gym clothes, but he didn’t want to hear it. “Open it up.” Shit, I was busted. No vodka, no party, no girls, and thirty days probation. Fucking Pinkertons.

And if that wasn't enough, last semester my girlfriend came to visit. I hadn’t seen her in about three weeks, so I was definitely ready to get it on. Well, we went to a movie and didn’t get back till about 12:15 at night. I tried to sign her in to my dorm, but the guard was like, “no female guests after midnight.” She had to sleep at my friend Tracy’s dorm in Amos.

Those fucking Pinkertons. They’re so anal about these stupid fucking rules. I swear to God. I’m 19 years old and they treat me like I’m five. I’m gonna go off one of these days, I swear.

Pinkertons suck.

Pinkertons Are People, Too
By Erasmus O’Neil, Homestead, PA (1892)

You know a lot of flack has been given lately to the Pinkertons. While I can-not condone every course of action they have undertaken in the past few weeks, I do-not think it necessary to hold them personally responsible either.

The Homestead strike was a terrible incident, one that will plague our nation for years to come. I do-not know if the steel-mill or town will ever be the same. However, we must lay blame where blame is due. Pinkertons are hired agents and hired guns. They are family-men just like you, the steel-mill workers at Homestead, and I. They are trying to earn a living and put food on the table. Times are difficult for many in this country. People are starving and out of work. There are not enough jobs for everyone. Oft times, people are forced to take whatever job they can get, no-matter what it is. If someone is forced to take a job they do not agree with or starve, which do you think they will pick?

We can-not continually blame these workers, the proletariat. They are-not responsible, but are merely following orders. The ones giving the orders, however, can-not escape blame. Andrew Carnegie and Henry Clay Frick made millions from the toil of these workers, and what thanks do they give them? A bloodbath. Seven steel workers died at Homestead: seven workers, seven fathers, and seven human beings. The Pinkertons are not responsible for these deaths, even-though they pulled the trigger. Carnegie and Frick can-not say the same, even-though they did-not even hold a gun.

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